Saturday, May 7, 2011

in the arms of all i'm keeping here with me.



Last year, a little part of me hoped that it would be the last time I wasn't actually a mother on Mother's Day. But here we are. Still hoping. And yet, I'm so full of love for all the mothers in my life that there's not really room for sadness.

To my dear amazing mom, I love you so much. You've been a source of kindness, generosity, and support — all my life. I'm proud that I'm like you in many ways, though I doubt I'll ever be as sweet or selfless. Oh and I'm pretty sure you were right about everything.

To my mother-in-law: you are full of grace, beauty and wisdom. I feel so lucky that I get to be your friend and learn from you — and lucky that I got to marry your son.

To my sisters, sisters-in-law and my friends near and far: thank you for being shining examples to me. And thank you for letting me love your babies as if they were my own.

Happy Mother's Day, all!

photos above of my mom when she was pregnant with my older sister; the pretty m-day card is from Rifle Paper Co.

28 comments:

  1. My mother waited for over six years and came a Mom overnight when she brought home my siblings. They brought me home after a phone call.

    No matter how you get to it, I hope it works out for you.

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  2. Angela, I understand how you are feeling completly. It took me ten years until I got to be a mom on Mother's Day. Keep praying, having faith, and moving forward. Somehow in the end it will all work out, trust me! {{hugs}}

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  3. I can also relate, Angela. It's hard, huh? Keep that pretty chin up...

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  4. :D love this. So much love, there's not room for sadness.

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  5. there isn't room for sadness! i love this post. i've seen that card before and always loved it.

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  6. (i wonder if we'll be mom's next year?)

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  7. here's to hoping THIS year is our last mother's day of not actually being mothers! awesome picture--those old photos are beautiful! :)

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  8. Angela, even though, I did have 2 children, they are over 4 years apart. I can remember it like it was yesterday of how badly I wanted and waitied for my babies. It's just like Lisa said; keep the faith and keep praying. One way or another, it can and will happen. All my love to you!

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  9. I love what you said, "there is no room for sadness." What a wonderful perspective! I have been slumping around being sad, but your post really opened my eyes. Thank you!

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  10. for some reason.. i am sitting here balling like a baby. i could not imagine waiting for something so precious but i am sure your blessings are waiting for you :) and i think you and my dear friend kate will be friends next year :)

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  11. i think you were sent here to this earth to make life pretty (amongst many other things).

    what a beautiful picture, and touching words.

    i'm saying a prayer in my heart that both you and kate will both be able to celebrate mother's day next year!

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  12. whoops.. that was me ^ class of 2001.

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  13. Hah! I'm feeling a little emotional tonight & this post didn't help. ;) But seriously, thank you for sharing your lovely words and perspective.

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  14. Angela, I can tell that you are tenacious and so full of love... I always feel happy and hopeful after visiting your blog :o)

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  15. as everyone else has already said, your words are really beautiful -- especially that you are so full of love there is no room for sadness. i really need to remember them when i'm feeling down about not being a mother yet, too.

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  16. Good luck with becoming a Mother, I hope it all works out for you. Those owls are the cutest!

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  17. This is my first ever visit to your blog. I do so relate to this post. We're a family built via adoption. For so long there was such pain and disappointment. Now, I could never wish it had all come together any way other than how it did. While I can still access the sadness - and I consider that a good thing and don't want it to be forgotten - I have to reach back pretty far. It's all now truly a source of strength in some bizarre way. From what I've gleaned from your blog just tonight, I have no doubt it will come for you.

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  18. I've been thinking a lot about you as we approach Sunday... and it started before I read this. Love you.

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  19. what a gorgeous post. you're in my thoughts today--sending good love your way that all that you wish for might come true.

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  20. I know you'll be the best mom! It will work out, I'm sure. Thanks for all you share, I'm sure it's hard and a lot of people feel the same way.

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  21. Someday you will be a wonderful mother! And your children will be so lucky to have someone who loves them so much, who dreamed and wished for them with each Mother's Day.

    Lovely image with the owls and books, they remind me of my own mother and grandmother!

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  22. Happy Mother's Day! I love the vintage photos you found, such a sweet way to remember our mothers and their mothers..... :)

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  23. this is so sweet. you are going to be a lovely mother someday. :)

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  24. you are amazing. Love your heart.

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  25. being in the 'inbetween state' is never easy. i am in one of those ruts myself. i wish you happiness and i know you find beauty all around you. this is truly making you stronger, you just can't tell yet. someday we'll realize why what happened happened. happy mother's day. someday your someday will come. xo.

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  26. My sisters and I have been seeing a fertility specialist here in the valley because three of us were recently diagnosed with PCOS. His name is Dr. Randall Craig and him and his team are AMAZING!

    -Camberley

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  27. I have the same owls! I inherited them from my mother!

    I love owls. Sigh.

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